Day 189: July 20, 2014

Thankfulness for the Me and You-ing

So I have been getting more comfortable talking about my own spirituality these days, not in light of my experience with the Church in the past so much, but who I am in the here and now and fitting pieces of Faith that are true from my life in the past and getting rid of the things that are strictly religion and don’t jive with those Letters in Red that I’ve been mentioning lately.

I’m not afraid anymore of facing my spiritual self. I used to ignore it completely because of my hurts and anger and bitterness toward Christianity and a select few Christians who I was hurt by. For several years, I simply threw the baby out with the bath water.

But that isn’t me. Not at my core. I am a very spiritual being. My ideas have broadened, my understanding of unconditional love is so incredibly otherworldly these days, and my ability to look past appearances and focus on the positive things of others just keeps getting stronger.

I often say “the Universe” as a general statement for God these days. I do it mostly because I want to separate myself from many people who have given God a pretty awful reputation (not ALL Christians, so don’t go getting your panties in a wad that I am speaking about you friends of mine who are Christians and stick around here, loving me and letting me be real without judgment). I also say “Universe” because people put God in a neat and tidy box and things that they feel don’t fit with their God get rejected… which often means rejecting PEOPLE.

Trust me. It happens all the time. I used to do it. It was done to me. That’s what woke me up to the twistedness of taking The Letters in Red and making them Man-Dictated and “Religious.”

So now you know why I say “the Universe.” I really do believe in God. I also happen to believe that Jesus was, is and will continue to be. It’s all the other hooey that muddles up his true love, actions and words.

It’s okay with me if you are an atheist, agnostic, Buddhist, Muslim, Greek Orthodox, Sun-Worshipper, gay, straight, bi… or whatever. You won’t get judgment from me. I truly do love you for who you are, what your are, who you were, and who you will become. Maybe we will hang out. Maybe we won’t in the future. But seriously, if you aren’t harming me, my children, my students, my friends, or any loved ones, or general groups of humans and animals, then just BE. I’m good with it. Proselytizing in any of its forms is something I will likely avoid for the rest of my life.

So when I received an art “reading” from my friend Pan Pantoja yesterday, I wasn’t scared that it was something evil or satanic or unclean… like I USED to when I was a slave to narrow religious thinking. I was open to seeing how the Universe was going to speak to Kate and me at Discover Dickerson Road.

Pan is a guy I work with. He is a writer, poet, artist, musician, teacher, thespian, ex-football player, and generally a Renaissance man. The students at Rainshadow Community Charter High School really dig him.

So here’s how it works: Pan sets up a blank canvas (or water color paper), starts asking questions of you, begins drawing as we are talking… very similar to Tarot Card reading. Except he doesn’t give me the interpretation. He just CREATES. Then in the block below, he writes as the Art Spirits move him.

And what you get can be pretty mind-blowing. That picture I posted here? Both Kate and I shared stories that were memories of our own fathers from childhood. All good ones. See the wings? Represents my Heavenly Father, too. Yeah. Pretty awesome.

And see that lady?

Well, here’s what the bottom says in case you can’t read it:

“Hello I say and nothing more
Good Bye I say and mean much more
Let the rug lie on the floor.
And what is under think no more
Stop the thinking
Stop the doing
Go on now
The Me and You-ing.”

Both Kate and I were floored. I’d say that made our time together pretty meaningful. And YES… God spoke to me through it.

Pretty sweet stuff. I live a truly charmed life.

God… the Universe… speaks to me ALL THE FRIGGIN’ TIME. Sometimes I am used to encourage others. I am so thankful that I am no longer afraid of the spiritual side of me.

Maybe Cancer brought this about. It has played a big part in it. But mostly it has come from all of you, loving me without expectations, judgements, rules or demands.

So during this Sunday Spiritual Reflection (something I am doing each Sunday now), I am thankful for you and how the Universe has worked through you to affect me and others in your life to show just how big God really is. Take a look at the Letters in Red. You will find yourself in there somewhere, doing some pretty wonderful things to love those who come into your life.

Love, The Me and You-ing

P.S. If I have tagged you, you have somehow shown me fellowship and love without judgement and have inspired me to not be afraid to face the issues from my past with religion and to figure things out lately. There are others of you, so don’t be offended. These are the ones that came to mind quickly. Much love to you all.PansTarotPicturesFromDickerson


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s